'the adventures of a thirty-ish university graduate' or, alternately and perhaps much more aptly: 'as mad as a barking fox'

Thursday, September 30, 2004

the space between the wicked lies

walking to reason and revelation today, i saw him.

that's right- after a few weeks of taking the long way to class, or going at odd times, or never leaving and then hiding in the bathroom and it all goes to hell when i'm on the stairs leading to the quad.

i had a death grip on my mug of coffee, sunglasses covering my scratchy sleep deprived eyes and earphones safely in my ears blaring out U2. when i'm in this mode, i feel pretty untouchable- my coffee shows that i'm a sophiscated twenty something who has an obvious need for a caffiene stimulant because i obviously have a wicked night life. the sunglasses are quite fashionable, denoting a certain flair for being instyle without being trendy and the earphones mean that i'm good enough to multi-task- that's right folks, i can walk and listen to music all at the same time. it also makes you wonder about what exactly it is i'm listening to.

anyways, up the stairs i go, feeling relatively safe in my cocoon of me, when i notice a herd of first years trudging down the steps towards me. automtically i drift to the right to get out of the way. and then, amongst them- a familiar [i think?] face. and damn- hair with gel in it. i remember that.

he veers towards me and i am almost cornered on the cornerless stairs when another group saves me and i dash away from the child i molested, walking quickly to the beat of sunday bloody sunday.

that was a close one.

don't have to tell you i love your precious heart

"is she asleep yet?"

"i don't know..ssssh, we can do it if we're quiet."

"ok....is that your hand?"

"maybe if i put.....and you...no..over there!"

"or....wait..."

"wait..DAMNIT THAT'S MY EYE!"

"just.."

"like that?"


pervert. i know what you're thinking. but yes, it was a conversation i had with someone. sadly- for me and her- it was all make believe and we're still sexually depraved beings.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

we're strange allies with warring hearts

"scandalous!" the vox screams [re-appearing on the internet after a long and restful break.] "SCANDALOUS!" i assume the repetiton in a much louder voice was to really get my attention. not that it needed to yell- the sane half of me was thinking the same thing as the crazy half of me.

they way things are set up here at school is that the residences are at one end of campus and the majority of the academic buildings are at the other end, over by the river. everyday [except for when it's forty below and beautiful and sunny and your snot freezes in your nose] there's a constant line of students trudging back and forth between these two areas. it's a slight incline, heading towards the land of academia. as a result of this miniscule incline some people have to walk extremly slow lest they exert themselves physically in any way.

anyways- a few days ago i was walking behind the. slowest. moving. person. ever. when he suddenly turned away and i was left with a view of the girl walking in front of him. she was short, with dark curly hair accentuated with some lighter strands. sunglasses on head, hoop earrings and shiny pink lip gloss.

and possibly the most scandalous pair of pants i have ever seen.

i'm of the opinion that no one ever told this poor girl that white is a colour that doesn't leave much to the imagination. especially when it's a thin, see-through white and you're wearing three stings to make up your underpants.

scandalous.

Monday, September 27, 2004

oh and i say damn your mood swings

kate and i talk on the phone a lot.

i mean, we never really have anything to say that's deep or meaningful in a world changing way or stunningly majestic, but we do talk a lot. it's usually about whether batman wears and underpants under his superhero garb, because he's already got underpants on the outside, and does that make the underpants on the outside actually underOVERpants, mutual friends or what and how much cheese i've consumed each day.

[today- five slices of no name old cheddar and three slices of premium havarti with fine herbs and spices. mmm...death by cheese...]

anyways, a few days ago as we were nattering about the simple nothings that fill up our time, kate asks me if i've noticed anything online yet.

"what the fuck are you talking about?" i ask her, thinking randomly about that moment in the boondock saints when the brothers mcmanus catch rocko copping a feel from the passed out stripper.

"you've been linked." kate delivers every line she ever says with such percision it's almost painful.

from her commets proceeds general exclaimations of surprise, horror but mostly joy, with me and kate screaming at each other while i eat cheese. for real. because it's obvious i love talking about myself. and knowing that some random people i've never met [maybe. person for sure] read about the mundane happenings of me fulfills item number seven hundred and eighty three point six on my to do list- pimp myself out, electronically, to the world. attention whore is a good saying.

the webbernet- it's a beautiful thing. heh.

[i'm pretty impressed with that sentence, just to let you all know.]

just give me what i want and no one gets hurt

i meant to write something chipper and maybe even slightly witty about latin class, but i got distracted by random things on the internet and chocolate, and with eating the other half of the cow i ate for dinner last night.

that is all.

Sunday, September 26, 2004

they know that they can't dance at least they know

that's it, i've got it figured out. i'm living with a bunch of crazies.

this morning, i rolled out of bed after a good nine hour sleep. the girls and i went on a tourist extravaganza yesterday, touring parliament, visiting the national art gallery [they have daumier's third class carriage... i almost exploded from sheer joy] and shopping in the market. that's always an adventure as the vegetable sellers are very competitive. i never knew there was a difference in field grown tomatos...

anyways, when we got home i wasted some time and then i went to bed fairly early for me. and then i woke up and made a delicious fruit salad. and got more gossip on the roomies.

last week caitlin broke up with her boyfriend and immediately proceeded to shag the guy from the other side of our floor that she smokes with. last night she brought home her old camp counsellor and shagged him as well.

if i can steal a phrase- there seems to be a lot of "shag shag shag-er-ty shagging" going on around here.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

burn idols for love

today was a total extravanganza.

first- it was the trip to the fruit market, where i purchased an entire frickin pineapple for a mere three dollars. [note- usually pineapples are like six dollars. so this is tremendously exciting.] then, i came back to the ottawa home and i baked pie. three pies. and i don't even have an oven. next, it was onto the general tutorial of alcoholic/professor goodness. then- it was driving in rush hour traffic, rocking out to u2. heh. gotta love that new song. then it was dinner, and a movie-

and then a yelling man crushed my soul because i obviously have issues with lane changes in downtown ottawa. meh.

tomorrow's looking good though- the four girls [meaning caitlin, anna, ashley and i] are going to go downtown to tour parliament and maybe hit up the market and the art gallery. and then at some point- church.

yes, i'm wondering if i'm feeling ok as well.

Friday, September 24, 2004

hello hello

i came within a few centimetres of rear ending someone last night.

since i have a vehicle here, i am trying to drive it on a regular basis. although this contributes to traffic congestion, pollution and all things bad, it keeps poor vanny from falling apart completely when i need him. ottawa is a bit freakish foe me- all those damned one way streets- but it's beginning to get a bit better.

last night i decided to drive down to south keys to do my grocery shopping. i'd never been there on the bus before, but i pretty much knew where it was. so i hopped in to my trusty...eerm, not-so-trusty...vanny and off i went.

now, the radio is broken in vanny.

when laura and i drove over here, it broke just as we were leaving owne sound. we managed to fix it with a hair clip and some tape, but the tape has gradually peeled away, so now the broken problem returns yet again.

so the drive should have been in complete silence. i mea, there was me talking to myself and singing "beyond the sea" in an off key way, but it should have been quiet. however, my radio suddenly flipped on.

"here's the new one from U2!" the radio guy excliams. "it's called vertigo!"

hence the reason why i nearly rear ended someone and ended up looking like a homicidal maniac when i got to the grocery store. it's good. it's really fucking good.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

i was happy for a day in nineteen seventy five

autum here is crunchy, like a french loaf.

regardless of that, class this morning was quite interesting. we were looking at the gospel of mark, and how it's a jagged, not very well put together little book. because our teacher loves us [ha! i hear you all laughing] we get a break right in the middle of class. five glorious minutes.

i'm sitting with victoria and lindsey- aka sasky- and humsboy is right in front of me. apparently the get together that i missed out on last night wasn't as spectacular as everyone had wanted. people are tired. victoria is sick and drinking tea.

"it's triple echinacea." she tells me.

"i like cranberry tea when i'm feeling poorly." i tell her. "with honey. lots of honey."

humsboy turns around. "did you just call me honey? sweet."

and me, your eternal dork, responded: "i know how to say 'greetings my honey' in latin."

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

the killer in me is the killer in you

wake up later than planned. elastic stuck in hair. no-go with the contacts. spill water on self. no milk for coffee. cut self instead of onion. missing green pepper. missing spatula. no omlette. coffee maker prohibits easy use of toaster oven. burn toast. scorch eggs. mess up latin homework. spill coffee on self.

today is stellar, and it's not even noon yet.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

what it is ain't exactly clear

what it comes down to is this:

tomorrow night, i'll not be walking to billings bridge, where i'll not be getting on the number 114 Kanata, and then i'll not be dinging at the greek souvlaki house. from there, i will not proceed across the road, and then down another block. i'll not be taking my first right onto wilshire, and i'll most definately not be going to second last house on the right.

the reasons for this are tossed up in the air, but really, i'm listening to that little voice that guides me. actually, it's not so little, it's kind of loud and obnoxious and tells secrets to you, like my justin timberlake guilty pleasure music listening.

wait....did i just type that?

Monday, September 20, 2004

so obviously desperate, so desperately obvious

tuesday messages me out of the blue, even though i am secretly hiding under the pretense of being "away" on msn.

"bubble...." her little message box pops up "are you coming out on wednesday?"

errm, did i miss something? i thought that most get togethers were well spaced, with enough time for a person to maybe regain a shred of dignity before venturing out to totally lose it all over again in a similiar situation. apparently i was wrong. but things got worse.

"you told me a little secret on saturday night." the little box stares accusingly at me, the letters forming words that i thought maybe weren't true. oh bloody hell, oh jesus. [maybe i should say jaysus!] mary mother and joesph...humsboy is turning the ripe old age of nineteen on wednesday, and since i professed my undying love for him in a drunken state to tuesday on saturday night, apparently it's a necessity that i join the maurading crew for a session of bar hopping in the market. [is nineteen still cradle robbing debauchery??]

can anyone dig a hole- really deep, and i want it done really quick- to save me from the massively embarassing situation i think i am about to embark on?

please?

music: response

i took the long way to class today, and went early, for fear that i might run into the young'un i molested at the party. luckily, i didn't see him, but i did run into some people in second year. they all waved, snickered and said hello in a very strange way.

and apparently, i owe a lot of people pie. i mean a lot of people. damn me and my drunken pie promising. note to self: get vegetable shortening because half of the people are vegans, and will therefore not eat the lard pastry.

this is my time of the year

i went dumpster diving again.

anna, caitlin, ashley and i decided that our common room needed a little snap, a little pizazz, or, as i like to think of it, a little ghettofab-ness to bring it up to dorm room standards. ashley thought that perhaps there might be some random crap beside the scary assed parking garage, so off we went.

"table with wheels!" i exclaim, pointing with excitmene as we come upon the pile of forgotten refuse. or maybe not so forgotten, as all of the damned tables were chained together. maybe it's time to invest in bolt cutters?

anyways, we retrieved an old [read-last year's style] carleton university sign from amid some broken glass and trudged back to leeds house. when we got to st.patrick's, which is being renovated, i jumped into a dumpster to have a look. sadly, nothing. [happily though, i put on the pants i was wearing last night-fucking covered in alcohol. how much money are my pants worth now i wonder? so the dirt is inconsequential as it's all going to be washed out tomorrow. oh yeah.] just before we trudged upstairs, caitlin made a decent find- an old office chair, orange/yellow in colour, issing only one wheel. definately that ghettofab look we're going for. so i carry the damned thing up four flights [cardiovascular workout accomplished, but i can feel the cigarettes from last night, that's for sure] and it now holds a place of hounour in our room.

tomorrow night, we plan on going to the glebe to hunt for more treasures, as the garbage collection for that neighbourhood is on tuesday.

this is terribly exciting, and i'm still not embarassed.

Sunday, September 19, 2004

we can dream this night away

" i think....i think i love you." i suddenly eye the boy i've just totally molested with a disapproving eye. you can't trust drunken professions of love, of this i'm quite sure. especially when they come from people younger than you.

last night really started with a run to the liquor store with amy, kiersten and lindsay in the middle of the afternoon. all together, we bought over two hundred dollars of alcohol. read that as- the potential for damage and danger.

at seven thirty, i headed over to fourth stormont [the home of last year] with kate from downstairs. there, we were met by robin, amy and about fifty first years whom we were escorting over to the party house. it took two otrains and one big assed bus and a ten minute walk, but eventually we arrived at the house. tuesday was already well on her way to being drunk, and i soon joined her.

now, i'm not one for major parties. usually i'm quite astonished at the number of illict activities that people participate in. however, instead of being a passive watcher, last night i was an active engager. once again, read- we smoked a lot of pot, drank waaaaay too much alcohol and acted outrageously stupid. or at least i did.

debauchery of note: the child molestation i comitted. smoking cigarettes with tuesday. i came home wearing a shirt that wasn't mine. my sweater was soaked because greg spilled water all over me. i threw water at victoria because she interrupted my child molestation. dennis, sausage pizza drunk man from last year, called me hot. i promised pie to a lot of people. gold schlagger in sara's room with victoria and [i think] liam. or maybe it was tyler? cat calling tuesday when she took justin upstairs. walking up to justin, grabbing him and saying "HAWT!" to him. getting licked by tuesday- because she wanted to make out with me, and i told her no. petting people's hair. giving wine to the first years after having to be aided and abetted by a third year to get said wine open. she totally broke the cork. professing my love for humsboy to tuesday. [shit- did i really do that? ohhhhhhh my good god...] dancing. sleeping with no pillow face down on a hardwood floor. spilling my drink in my lap.

the list goes on, but i have to get to the airport.

ewwww- public transport.

billy liar

five things to never do while so intoxiated you can hardly stand at the humanities party for the first year students:

1. make out with the first year students
2. make out with the first year students
3. make out with the first year students
4. make out with the first year students
5. make out with the first year students

i've done a bad, bad thing....

Friday, September 17, 2004

fascination street

i have to say that i'm pretty impressed with myself right now. i'm the most computer illiterate person out there. i type with two fingers [hence the massive typos that i ardently try to remove but almost always miss] and i've got to admit that i don't even know what html stands for.

yet check out the majestic photo of the fish.

oh yeah. i kick some major ass right now.

i want to run

there's nothing like waking up to a sunny day, having a cup of coffee-pour of milk and half teaspoon of sugar- and a cheese sandwich with the bread all squished down so that it's stuck to the cheese.

add in a bit of u2 to the mix.... i think it's going to be a good day

i like the colour of my hair, i've got a friend who loves me

"i've seen her breasts!" kate exclaims to me, her voice echoing across the line. "now i want to see her brains!"

after too much jesus day, who would have figured that i had it in me to go down to south keys and cart back about eight million pounds [read: seventy five dollars worth] of groceries in my backpack? not i. but i did it. and i mean entirely in my backpack. except the eggs as i was terrified that they would smash, and the bread because i hate it when it gets squished unless i do it on purpose. i'm proud to say that once again, meat will be a part of my diet. after five days, i missed it terribly. tomorrow- death to the thighs of the chicken. and on saturday- death to the piece of beef that could eat my face.

anyways, away from the animal killings and on to kate and the brains. indirectly.

the floor here is very quiet. i'm used to hearing doors slamming and people yelling and the word fuck rebounding everywhere in the halls in residence. it was just engrained in me last year that this was it. leeds is nothing like this. if i even hear a murmur of something it's totally exciting. so this evening, i decided to bake home made chocolate chip cookies from scrath and take them to all those who were awake. after all- how can you not love the gift of cookie? after baking up about four dozen of the cicrles of happiness, anna and i head out on the floor to meet and greet the masses. or at least someone.

first stop was random open door to the left of ours and across the hall. it's a suite of boys. i remember steve had two cookies. and the other boy just one. i guess we know who my favourite there is. mission looking good. next stop: tv lounge. on the way we see someone exiting with a bowl of peas. we stop and meet rochelle, adrienne and tabu, girls in third and fourth year. they're extremely nice and also enjoyed the cookies. except adrienne, as she's a vegan and therefore scorned the use of my animal by-products. back to the tv lounge, where we give cookies to the people wathcing tv only to find out that they aren't even from this floor, just visitors. but it was still nice.

sadly, no one else was out and about.

back to my room, where i finally call kate back. she's watching a movie about a private school of girls. there's some lesbian action, and then, if i remember how it goes, one girl decided that she actually likes boys. i saw the film a long time ago and remember that there was a bird involved.

kate was quite disgusted as the rejected girl leapt to her death from atop the building. hence the boobs and brains comment.

i think it's more than time to go to bed.

by the way i tried to say

in my all consuming passion to write down the mundane happenings of here, i totally forgot about the excitement of my first comment.

now, when i started this...blog.... it's intention was mainly for me to keep track of things because i am a simply terrible journal keeper. i mean the journal where you have to write with a pen, put it all on paper..you know? the journal i do write in has been the same for six years now, and there really aren't a lot of pages in it. anyways, i never expected anyone to read it until i totally pimped mysef out. but the pimping was mainly to my friends, and no one else.

imagine my excitement when andre was the first person to comment.

oh yeah. here i was thinking that no one ever read this thing except me and a few people who hear it all by phone anyways.

man. the attention whore in me is both excited and a little bit freaked out.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

it was a grey morning and they wondered how they would fare

"do you want to go dumpster diving?" anna's eyes glint as i throw the suggestion out to her, her head quickly nodding in the affirmative.

today started with too little coffee and far too much jesus. ten o'clock is not an unreasonable hour for class to begin, i totally understand this. but after staying up well past my regular bedtime, and only getting half the amount of caffeine laden nectar i was used to, well.... jesus was a little overwhelming.

after jesus it was break time. i ate this fantastic cup of yogurt, read plato's crito outloud with gabrielle on the quad sitting under a tree andgotinagrassfightwiththehumsboy. *cough*

then it was lecture number two of the core seminar. i think that the reputation of this year scares a lot of people, and after that class and the following discussion group, i can understand why. normally, second year is referred to as a sort of dark time, likened to travelling through hades only to get lost and be stuck someplace other then the elysium fields for a great amount of time. i'm thinking it might not be that bad, just a bit..worrisome at times.

like today for instance. when professor macisaac told us that we don't know what a cookie tastes like. we don't know anything we experience. it's impossible to know. knowledge is only universal, and usually, but not always, measurable. the cookie is not known because the cookies is sensed.

my brain hurts too.

and then, when i got home, there was excited chatter coming from the common room. at the table: random girl i don't know. on the couch: ashley in a very mini skirt. yelling about lightbulbs [or so i thought] from her room: anna. and on the floor- two awesome lithographs by an unknown artist that ashley had rescued from a dumpster behind the art gallery.

"there were more, like, under the garbage in there. but i was so totally not, like, diving in the trash!" she laughs, twirling a finger around one of the red extensions in her hair. anna laments the fact that someone has actually thrown away, "into the actual dumpster" she intones in a distressed air, art. so i ask her if she wants to go and possibly, retrieve, some of these works of art.

up to my arms in pizza crusts, broken glass, flourescent light rods and tim horton's coffee cups, rescuing very strange and slightly disturbing lithographs and loving every moment of it- is that a bad thing?

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

what made it special

so i totally copped out and got a new format here. the attention whore in me has also reared its ugly head by both sticking a picture of myself up online for anyone to see, and by giving people the chance to comment on my most witty and daring posts.

now we'll see if i'm really as popular as i want to believe i am.

when i come around

it smells like dead leaves outside.

regardless of this, the cicadas continue to sing. their little and yet intense eeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEE noise fills the air outside my window with a ceratin urgency, a desperate kind of longing. it's like those ugly little bugs are trying to warn me about something. i'm not sure what.

and the smell of dead leaves continues to permeate the air.

fuck you, you're drunk

i emerge from my room mumbling latin to myself and am greeted by a complete stranger.

ashley and caitlin went over to oliver's, the campus pub, to watch the hockey game. [canada won, by the way.] afterwards, they came home, and ashley and i chatted for a bit about going to concerts and how unenthuastic fans were stupid and horrible. then i wandered back to my latin, ashley to her room, and things were quiet until i heard caitlin come in. accompanied by a male companion

curiousity killed the cat. what i want to know is, was the cat killed because it just had to find out what it was curious about and actually did, and died as a result of this? or did the cat die because it never actually found out what it was curious about; was it that tha cat was left in a perpetual state of curiousity the cause which eventually killed it? i decided to be killed by seeking what i was curious about.

so there we sat: ashley straight across, anna tucked up to my left, caitlin's feet entangled in each other to the right of me, and brad from the other side beside her. we all gesticulate madly, sharing stories of nakedness, street parties in kingston, professors, being serenaded during fire alarms and the weather.

it's nice to just be sometimes.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

what a cruel thing to pretend, what a cunning way to condescend

kate and i talk online a lot.

last year, when we were a mere three feet apart, we used to send instant messages to each other just because we could. i'm of the opinion that it's partly because of the ease- why talk when you can type? or maybe it was because of the sheer ridiculousness of it that we did it. regardless- we talk on line a lot.

tonight's conversation has a few choice extracts:

"that's too bad... at least statistically speaking you should eventually end up shagging him!" followed in quick succession by: "fruit is always good to make up stories about" and rounded off with: "wait- you're wearing UNDERoverpants?"

man. i think we need some help over here.

the poets let a generation down

right now is my favourite time.

the sun shines through the trees, just reaching into my room. there's a sliver of golden that dances on my wall, reminding me of my room at home. the quality of light is still good, but there's a hint of things slowing down, drying up, tucking down, hiding away, preparing.

i like that.

Monday, September 13, 2004

and it makes me feel so fine i can't control my brain

my latin instructor rolls into class and instantly recoils at the fifteen girly faces grinning at him.

this morning i woke up rather later then i had planned, but this whole having no calss till eleven thing is definately working to my advantage- afterall, i have no kate to put on bono to wake me up in the morning. anyways, it was discoverd as we sat in the UN room in paterson hall that we were a class made up entirely of girls. until joe came in. he has a unibrow and was even more violent with his recoil than professor jeffereys.

we went through some review- it wasn't too to bad, but i certainly have a lot of brushing up to do with my memorization of gender and how things decline.

i came back to my room for cheese- i swear it's going to be the death of me- and then i went out to take care of my 'business' for the day. OSAP and the registrar's office...also know as placed with the line up of doom. or so i expected, but OSAP only took about an hour and a quarter to take care of, and the girl was massively nice. and the registrar's office had next to no line. but the lady there was mean. woe to me.

on ym way back from all of these, i saw a guy wearing big bad-ass black boots with about a trillion buckles on them. i was going to ask to take a picture of them but i had forgotten my camera.

double damn.

at the sign of the prancing pony

so there i was, in bed and almost asleep less than five minutes ago when it dawns on me not-so-suddenly that i kinda sorta maybe have a bit of a maybe sorta funny little more than girly crush on one of the dashing young hums boys.

and no, i'm not telling you who it is.

and i totally cackled when it kinda not-so-suddenly dawned on me.

Sunday, September 12, 2004

we'll meet beyond the shore

i cackled a lot today.

cackle number one: when i looked in the mirror just after eleven when i finally woke up and saw my oh so fantastic hair. i mean, it's not long and it's not short, but how it ever looked like that is beyond me.

cackle number two: when caitlin started screming at her boyfriend on the phone- "NO! I'M NOT COMPROMISING WITH YOU!AAAAARRGGHHHHHHnooooooooo...." and slammed down the phone. and then came in and apologized, and agreed with me when i said it all sounded kind of like a bad death moment. she cackled with me.

cackle number three: when i went to res commons to put money on my card, and saw a bunch of frosh going out to drink, and macking with each other. over heard comment by other disapproving frosh on the whole 'fuck the frosh' attitude of the day- "hello. STDs."

cackle number four- sitting in my room and reading a greek play- they said arse so many time i think my head is going to explode.

hahahaha- i think that counts a cackle right there.

don't have to be beautiful

random roommate fact number forty seven:

in the middle of preparing to watch the goonies kate and i were interrupted by some people at the door, looking for caitlin. they came, admired the room, and left. when caitlin got back, i told her that she had had visitors and they had left notes all over her room. she goes in, laughs and tells us that one of her firends probably has a bladder infection, and that once, she got a bladder infection because she had too much sex. how much sex was too much sex?

"like four times a day. we had nothing else to do."

Saturday, September 11, 2004

left there on the beach

after i drop kate off, it feels quite quiet.

on friday morning, the plan was to get up early and walk down to all books with robyn to get the books needed for reason and revelation. [funny thing here- so it's sometimes called the r&r class, or i think it is, but after getting the books, i see no rest and relaxation in my reason and revelation future.] anyways, we didn't get started quite as early as we had planned due to sleeping in, but we still walked downtown.

now, carleton is centrally located in ottawa, if you consider nepean and place d'orleans and all the other surburbia that makes up ottawa, ottawa. mapquest tells me that it's eight kilometres from here [carleton] to there [all books], but i'm having a hard time digging that. well, regardless, robyn and i walked down there to retreive the masses of books we needed.

eleven books.

the cash register man rang them through and told me the total. immediate red flags flare up because i am positive that there's no way it can be right. i ask him if he's sure that's it, that the price he is telling me is correct and he patiently smiles and assures me that yes, it's correct, and he knows so mainly because he's sold the same elven books about fourteen times in the past half hour. so i smile and put the eleven books- totalling a mere one hundred and sixty eight dollars and seventy six cents- on my debit card.

then it was the bus back to sunnyside, where robyn showed me a fantastic fruit and veggie mart where i bought two pears, two oranges, a massive bag of srping mix and some renee's salad dressing for a mere seven dollars. and then home, where i put my feet up and cursed the hotness of the day.

the feet up lasted only a few minutes though. kate messaged me on msn- which i both love yet think of as the devil- to ask me what the plan was. so i called her, and opted for staying in until i heard that les wanted to rent jersey girl and watch it at her house while eating shrimp.

yes. i use my friends for movies and food. heh.

so back downtown i went, this time opting for the bus the entire was as me poor leggies couldnae handle another trek adventure. i arrived just as the shrimp was finishing, so we ate that and then dashed off to the movie store to get the movie.

alas for us, it wasn't there. so we racked our brains, les and kate and i, for a movie that would be both very girly, and yet still highly enjoyable. we had finally agreed on tomb raider [i'm not sure how this qualifies- i think it may be because we all think angelina kicks a lot of ass. i mean a *lot* of ass] when i suddenly remembered a great jane austin flick that we'd all enjoy.

so home it was with mansfield park which was enjoyed by all the masses. i consumed copius amounts of sugar and then had to go home with my tag along mate, tag along kate. we stayed up to late looking at moby pictures- decided he had a nice dog- and then this morning we planned on going to the national art gallery. it's a sin that we'd never been.

sadly, i'm still a sinner because we never made it past third avenue on bank street. first, we were distraced by the many numbers of garage sales by the school. it seems that the south end of ottawa was having a large rummage sale and everyone was involved. i saw many things before i saw it- a non-steam iron from the late fifties to mid sixities with box and instructions. after some debating, a walk to look at used clothing and an excellent lunch of falaffel at the glebe cafe- it became mine. oh iron- maybe tomorrow i'll iron my underpants. talk about excitement.

next- it was down to south keys where i bought winter boots [ugly], some milk, five notebooks, some black pens, a pair of imitation running shoes [which were ugly to me at first but i am slowly loving them], the big golden book of latin verbs [pardon me while i drool on myself from excitement] and popcorn that has greek instructions on the bag.

after returning home, i cooked dinner, kate and i watched the goonies and i drove her home.

no wonder i feel like sleeping for three days.

Thursday, September 09, 2004

i am weightless

today was wet.

no, that's a friggin understatement because today i walked through a puddle that was knee deep. today it downpoured for more than six hours. today i see a lake outside of my window. today the sun has not appeared once because of the cloud. today there were eighteen traffic accidents to report at nine am because of wind and rain combinations. today the first floor of my residence had to be evacuated because it flooded. so i guess today was more than wet.

today was also slightly expensive, as i had to buy my first books. the jesus class: one course pack, one textbook. total cost: ninety one dollars and seventy cents. lets all say it together now: OUCH. it's nothing compared to what reason and revelation is going to cost though- i have a total of eight authors that make up my list- and most of them have three books. and then there's the style guide. all together now folks, you know the drill...wahhh....

in other totally random news, i sat around on monday and read most of sayard's blog. she spent the summer in england on a work visa, and seemed to have an awesome time. she sat next to me in latin last year and i keep meaning to get in contact with her. sadly- we all know i suck at this. but i did listen to some of the music she experienced live just now.

septembre in september.

heh. something funny about that to me.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

you know how i do

today an advertisment told me that i could "put more jingle in my sporan." and i had a conversation with the bus driver. but let me begin in the boring way- at the beginning.

today was leslie's birthday, so we all got together to have dinner, even though it's not the traditional friday. i decided that i really wanted to go to the fruit market on elgin street to pick up some fruit for dessert. so off i went, listening to moby.

just as i got to sunnyside and bank, i noticed this girl in front of me. it was tomi, my res fellow from last year on fourth stormont. when i told her i was walking to u of ottawa she told me i was crazy, but she walked a short way with me. we talked about where everyone on the floor was and i learned the secret of the never recieved email list from the end of last year- tomi lost it while she was moving. [she's since found it and has agreed to send it out at some point....it wasn't terribly clear when.]

eventually we parted ways- and my searh for the fruit market began. see, i've never gone there before. i know it's on elgin, but i wasn't sure where it was exactly. so i wandered over towards elgin street.

which wasn't there.

apparently, elgin and bank are not quite as parallel as i thought at this point in the city. so i wandered back to bank, and then after walking for a while, realized that i could now surely get to elgin. i walked to my right, and ended up at this strange intersection that i was stuck at because i had no idea how the traffic worked. there were lines all over the road and people zooming onto and off of the 417. and an abanonded building or eight around me. after finally getting across the road, i walked north a few more blocks before i actually could see elgin street.

[side note- in my wanderings i found the embassy for ghana *and* hungary. go me!]

sadly- when i got to elgin street, there was no fruit market. i was already past it- but i think it was only by a block or two. instead of doubling back again though, i decided that i would just keep going north. and then i found sugar mountain.

i can't even explain the joy of this store. it's true to its name though- there's a mountain of sugar in there. after walking around the store two dozen times, i bought leslie some tootsie roll pops- not because i knew she liked them, but because they were my favourites and i knew that i would get one. aren't i evil?

after all of this, i thought my day was complete- but then i found a store about two blocks away from leslie's and laura's that was full of everything jesus. i mean *everything*. there were crucifixes, [crucifi?] and pictures, and rosarys, and endless other majestic jesus things. i'm going to have to go back there and make a purchase.

finally- i made it to leslie's. we then proceeded to the byward market which was equally majestic. i think i may make it a friday morning tradition to go down there to get groceries and fresh things in the weeks of nice weather that are to come. we bought potatoes, berries, corn on the cob, and this massive bag of spring mix for something like two dollars. then back we went to the house and i cooked up a pretty delicious meal. nobody died, in case you were wondering. damn that poison.

next- it was the adventure home. i walked up to the bus stop only to realize that i had nearly fifteen minutes to wait. so i watched the night life on rideau, and laughed at obvious frosh people in shower caps. then the bus came, and i settled back into moby.

until i was the last person on the bus and the bus driver started talking to me. and asked me if there was a number i could be reached at. was it horribly wrong that i said no and then laughed when i got off the bus, because he was a sad man who also told me that i should have fun before i get old? and he said he would look for me again.

i ponder what he meant by all of that. i think i need to listen to the police's every breath you take and stay away from the number seven. or maybe i should give him kate's number.

muahahahahaha.


Tuesday, September 07, 2004

there walks a lady we all know

"BUBBLE!" yells tuesday, her hands cupped around her mouth and her skirt blowing in the ferocious wind. we run towards each other like a cliched romance movie in super slow motion, both talking and laughing the entire time.

today i woke up with the plan to go to ikea in my head. there were some random things i needed- like a pole lamp because my room is dim- and power bars and extension cords and a night table of sorts. tuesday was going to come along, but when we got to talking about it, we discovered that it would probably conflict with the welcome for the first year hums kids that we wanted to go to.

they have free food at these events. why wouldn't i go?

so, we ditched ikea and made no plans, opting for the welcome lecture. the lecture given was great, the speaker was some man who had first gone to university like fifty seven years ago or something. "man....that's...well, that's a looonnggg time ago." tell me about it eh?

afterwards, we found no free food- just the remenants of some fruits and vegetables. there was pineapple, which was terribly exciting as it was the first fresh thing i got to eat in two days. grinchy was there, and said hi to me just as i stuffed a whole tomato in my mouth. classy. he's still the coolest prof ever.

next, we mingled with people, catching up. pete and i talked for a bit, and he really wants me to come and see his house. maybe thursday...i cannot remember what we planned. the bubble and i searched for first years to talk to, but they had all scurried back to wherever they go- so instead we hooked up with liam and went to fourth stormont- our home last year. i think it's fair to state that we were waaaay cooler than the kids up there now are. i mean, there's business people in my room. pah. what is that?

anyways, we ended up going to south keys with anna, and i bought everything from a shower pole to pillows. my room is coming along quite nicely. i even started the manwall again. huzzah.

all i need now is some more pineapple.

new orleans is sinking man and i don't want to swim

anna looks worridly at the toster oven. "they're not growing!" she exclaims, poking the muffins inside for the eight billionth time.

when i arrived at my suite on sunday, things looked like DANGER. laura and i were given the once over from the girl in the corner room and didn't seem to meet approval. i was of course immediately defensive, so it didn't take long for me to assume that these girls were going to be a nightmare. i told leslie as much when we dropped off laura's things at their amazing large apartment.

"evil! THEY'RE EVILLLLL!" i would have continyed but leslie's bed distracted me for a bit.

but after returning home and spending the entire day with anna yesterday, i must admit that my first impression was dead wrong. anna is a sweet girl who can, despite her worrying, bake a wicked mean muffin. she says that's about all she can do, but i don't believe it. her family is polish- which means that i got to see a polish [i think] vogue magazine and listen to the language tripping along for a good couple of hours yesterday. it was beautiful.

girl number two- ashley- hasn't been here a lot but assures us that nothing we do will offend her- so to just go ahead and move her stuff all we want. muahaha...control!

and mystery girl number three- caitlin, who for a few brief moments was thought by kate and i to be none other than the caitlin from last year, which almost induced a heart attack- has been here for a total of maybe...twenty?.. seconds. i think that she's not going to be here a lot.

i think i'm going to go and scam another muffin. mmmmmm....

Sunday, September 05, 2004

there's a change that's coming through

quite frankly, after all of that...i think that i'm far too knackered to really put down any of it. it was long, and at times smelly, then sparkly and slightly dangerous. then it was longer, and hot and then quite large. it was enjoyable, quickly turned into a nightmare and then resumed it's path to maybe-goodness.

but i forgot my damned pillows.

damn.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

burning on my lips

i look around my room in pseudo dispair.

"there's no way you can possibly have this much stuff to take to school..." pipes up the vox. however, anyone who knows me can already envision the pile. it's dangerous, like, i-wouldn't-want-to-stand-beside-it-if -it-were-all-stacked-on-itself dangerous. massive.

anyways, atleast it's done, a feat i thought next to impossible. i only really have one bin of random crap, but i mean, i deem it important random crap. latin books, moulin rouge and my elepant water can are all essential to my survival at school...reallah. i swear.

now i just have to worry about making my minions cart it around campus and then up the four flights to my room. the evil part of me is laughing heartily, i guarantee you.

i miss those will-be minions.