give me your hand

right now it's kate bush coming from my speakers and i've got goosebumps all down the back of my legs. i can smell the way my room smelled last year just before christmas- crisp because the window was frozen open. i can tell you where my coffee cup is, and what each pile of paper is for. if i close my eyes i can tell you where my posters were. i can see the suite, it's purple carpet and non-descript walls somehow containg a bit of who we were. i remember ashley holding me tight as i sobbed uncontrollably in the kitchen in the middle of december. i can see the dishes and feel the glow from caitlin's television.

i can see my mom on eighth street. i see my sister when she was sixteen, her hair tumbling down her back, beautiful as always. i can see james holding a piece of paper up in front of him, seeing something that no one else can see. i can feel more than visualize kevin in a subterranean lair he calls his room, fighting to escape and smiling with a heart of gold and only good intentions.

"give me these moments, give them back to me."